


Last Hope

by Of_stars_and_moon



Series: First Wizarding War Wolfstar fics [1]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, First War with Voldemort, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Mild Hurt/Comfort, POV Remus Lupin, wolfstar
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-29
Updated: 2020-02-29
Packaged: 2021-02-28 05:40:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,135
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22958821
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Of_stars_and_moon/pseuds/Of_stars_and_moon
Summary: The night before Remus has to go away on a mission to work underground with Greyback's pack(I suck at summaries sorry)
Relationships: Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Series: First Wizarding War Wolfstar fics [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1659715
Comments: 12
Kudos: 60





	Last Hope

Two weeks

It had been two weeks since Remus had seen Sirius. Two weeks since Sirius had left for some mission with James. Two weeks of coming back to an empty flat, two weeks of sleeping in a cold bed without Sirius' warmth enveloping him, two weeks spent worrying and missing him terribly. 

Since they had joined the Order, they had never been away from each other for so long. They were usually assigned for a mission together. But even after Sirius arguing that he wanted to go on the mission with Remus, Dumbledore hadn't agreed, but sent them to different missions. 

Remus hadn't understood why he had been so adamant in his decision, but after his conversation with the headmaster today, he did. 

"You have to work underground with Greyback's pack as a spy and gain their trust," Dumbledore had said. It wasn't a question or a request, but a order. And even though the mere thought of seeing the person who had cursed him and ruined his life made Remus feel nauseous, he knew he couldn't say no. He owed everything to Dumbledore; the man had given someone like Remus an opportunity to come to Hogwarts and that had changed his life. And Remus knew there wasn't any other way. Voldemort was gaining more power everyday— they all had to do their part in stopping him.

He just wished that it didn't mean having to be away from Sirius and the others for weeks or god knows how long. Dumbledore had told him not to tell the others about this— a "secret mission" he had called it— and Remus knew why. If the others, especially Sirius, found out, they would never let Remus do it. 

He himself didn't want to go on this mission. He knew it was a selfish thought, the war had to be stopped. But Greyback had plagued his nightmares for so long, and facing him was the last thing Remus wanted to do. 

Suddenly, he heard the door open, followed by approaching footsteps and then a soft, "Re?" 

Sirius. 

Remus felt a weird mixture of relief and dread at the fact that Sirius was back. He had somehow managed to convince himself that he would leave tomorrow. How could he leave when Sirius had just been back? 

"Hmm?" he hummed, pretending to be sleep. He wanted to run to Sirius and pull him in his arms, but he knew he would break down and tell Sirius everything. 

The mattress shifted as Sirius slid under the covers, and wrapped an arm around Remus from behind. "Merlin, I missed you so much," he said, voice shaking with emotions. 

Tears burned in Remus' eyes. He didn't want to go anywhere tomorrow. He couldn't do it. 

He swallowed past the lump in his throat and whispered, "Me too." 

Sirius might have heard something in his voice, as he asked, "Re? Are you okay?" 

The first tears escaped, falling down on the pillow, as he covered Sirius' hand with his own. "Yeah...Now that you're here, I'm okay." His voice broke at the end and he hoped that Sirius hadn't noticed. 

As the other boy was quiet for a while, Remus thought he might have fallen asleep, but then Sirius murmured, "Gosh, it was hell being without you for so long. I'm never letting Dumbledore send me to these long missions without you again." 

The words and the desperation in Sirius' voice as he held Remus tighter broke Remus even more. He felt suffocated, like he was drowning in water. He sucked in a sudden breath and the first sob escaped; a broken shuddering sound cutting through the silence in the room. 

"Re? What's wrong?" Sirius asked hurriedly, voice concerned. 

Trying to stop the sobs, Remus managed to say, "Nothing... I'm okay. Just…" He knew he had to at least tell Sirius that he was leaving tomorrow. "I...I have to go on a mission tomorrow." 

Over his own silent sobs, he heard Sirius inhale sharply and under his palm, he felt Sirius' hand clench tightly. 

"When...When are you leaving?" 

"Tomorrow morning," Remus whispered. 

Sirius mumbled something that sounded like "No" a few times before saying, "I'll come with you." 

Remus shook his head against the pillow. "No, Sirius. You can't." 

"I can't be away from you again. I want to come too." 

"Sirius. You can't," Remus argued, voice almost rising. 

Sirius' arm slipped away from his waist and his voice was filled with hurt as he asked, "You...You don't want me to be there with you?" 

No. Not like this. Please don't be mad at me. 

Wiping his eyes furiously, Remus turned over to face Sirius, who was staring down at his hands resting between them.

"Of course I want you to be there," Remus said, reaching out to place his hand on Sirius' cheek. "But it's not possible. Dumbledore said I have to go alone." 

"I don't care what he says. I want to go. I can't go on more weeks like this," Sirius said desperately, leaning into Remus' touch. 

"Sirius, you know that isn't possible." 

"But can't someone else go instead of you? Can't you stay for just some more days?" 

No one else can do it. No one else is a goddamn werewolf. 

"I can't," Remus said, voice trembling. "I wish there was some other way, but I have to go...I am sorry." 

Sirius shut his eyes and brought his hand up to hold Remus' wrist. 

"I'm going to miss you," Remus said, sniffling. 

"Me too," Sirius croaked, eyes still closed as his grip tightened. 

"I love you so much." 

"Don't-" Sirius opened his eyes which were filled with tears now. "Don't. You're making this sound like a goodbye," he breathed out. 

It may as well be. 

"It's not," Remus said, trying to put on smile. 

Sirius took in a shaking breath and leaned forward, pressing his lips to Remus'. "It's not," he mumbled against Remus' lips.

"It's not," Remus repeated, and Sirius rolled on top of him as he deepened the kiss.

Remus ran his hands through Sirius' hair and over his chest, memorising the way he felt under Remus' touch. 

'When will I have you in my arms like this again? Will I ever get to hold you again? What if I don't make it back?' 

He pushed the thoughts away; not wanting to think about all the terrible things that the future may bring. He just wanted to live in this moment forever; Sirius' warmth surrounding him, Sirius' hands cupping his cheeks, his lips breaking away from Remus' only for short gasps of air like he wasn't willing to put any distance between them. 

And as he pulled Sirius even more closer, Remus couldn't really think of anything else except them, and this moment. 

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you all liked it! Kudos and comments are really loved!


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